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Weird Al Yankovic( Alfred Matthew Yankovic )

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Singer Intro
Weird Al Yankovic( Alfred Matthew Yankovic )

your horoscope 4 today

AQUARIUS!

There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus! Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole 17 hours a day.

PISCES!

Try to avoid any Virgos or Leo's- with the ebola virus! You are the true lord of the dance- no matter what those idiots at work say.


ARIES!

The look on your face will be priceless when you find that 40-pound watermelon in your colon! Trade toothbrushes with an albino dwarf then give a hickey to Meryl Streepe!

TAURUS!

You will never find true happiness. Whatcha gonna do cry about it?!? The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up, do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep!

That's your horoscope for today-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay! Thats your horoscope for today! (x2)

GEMINI!

Your birthday party will be ruined once again by your explosive flagilance! Your love life will run into trouble when your fiance hurls a javelin through your chest!

CANCER!

The position of jupiter says you should spend the rest of the week facedown in the mud! Try not to shove a roll of duct tape up your nose while taking your driver's test.

LEO!

Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt and staple it to your boss's face, oh no! Eat a bucket of tuna flavored pudding and wash it down with a gllon of Strawberry Quik!
Find more lyrics at ※ Mojim.com

VIRGO!

All Virgos are extremely friendly and intelligent- except for you! Expect a big surprise today- when you wind up with your head impaled upon a stick!

That's your horoscope for today-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay! That's your horoscope for today! (x2)

Now you may find that inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that the relative positions of the planets and the stars could have a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies to only you, but let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions are all based on solid,scientific, documented evidence so you would have be some kind of moron not to realize that all of them are absolutely true- where was I?

LIBRA!

A big promotion is just around the corner- for someone much more talented than you! Laughter is the very best medicine- remember that when your appendix burst next week!

SCORPIO!

Get ready for an unexpected trip- when you fall screaming from an open window! Work a little bit harder on improving your low self-esteem, you stupid freak.

SAGITTARIUS!

All your friends are laughing behind your back! Kill them. Take down all those naked pictures of Ernest Borgnine you've got hanging in your den!

CAPRICORN!

The stars say that you're an exciting and wonderful person, but, you know they're lying! If I were you I'd lock my doors and windows and never never never never never leave my house again!

That's your horoscope for today-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!
That's your horscope for today! (x4)





Weird Al Yankovic( Alfred Matthew Yankovic )
Miscellaneous
Album songs
1.If I Could Make Love To A Bottle
2.Kidstar 1250 Radio Promotion
3.Laundry Day
4.Leisure Suit Serenade
5.Matter Of Crust
6.Never Met A Person As Wonderful As Me
7.Nobody Here But Us Frogs
8.Pacman
9.RealRadio 104.1
10.School Cafeteria - Version 1
11.School Cafeteria - Version 2
12.Sometimes You Feel Like A Nut(Provided)
13.Take Me Down
14.Take Me To The Liver
15.Take The 'L' Out Of Liver(Provided)
16.The Ballad Of Kent Marlow
17.The Night Santa Went Crazy (Extra Gory)
18.Ugly Girl
19.We Got The Beef
20.Weenie In A Bottle
21.Won't Eat Prunes Again
22.You Don't Take Your Showers
23.Hooker On Corner
24.Wannabe Stromtrooper
25.What If God Smoked Cannabis
26.Genius in France
27.food medley as performed in 1985 - 01
28.food medley as performed in 1985 - 02
29.food medley as performed in 1985 - 03
30.food medley as performed in 1985 - 04(Provided)
31.food medley as performed in 1985 - 05
32.food medley as performed in 1985 - 06
33.food medley as performed in 1985 - 07
34.food medley as performed in 1985 - 08
35.food medley as performed in 1985 - 09(Provided)
36.food medley as performed in 1985 - 10
37.food medley as performed in 1985 - 11
38.food medley as performed in 1985 - 12
39.food medley as performed in 1985 - 13
40.Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
41.Eat It!
42.Phoney Calls
43.Pretty Fly For A Rabi
44.Mr Popiel
45.Cabletv
46.Polka Party
47.Attack Of The Radioactive Hamsters From A Planet N
48.Money For Nothing, Beverly Hillbillies
49.Walking Around In Women's Underwear
50.Dirty Deeds (Done With Sheep)
51.Threes Company Perodie(not Weird al)
52.The Jedi song
53.your horoscope 4 today (Modify)
54.Let's Bomb Iraq
55.Bob (best version)
56.Rocky Road
57.Barney's on Fire
58.which backstreet boy is gay
59.Im The Only Gay Eskimo
60.Make My Boobies 1 More Size
61.TV Tan(Provided)
62.Constipated (AAvril Lavigne 'Complicated' parody)
63.White and nerdy
64.Amish Paridise(Provided)
65.E-Bay
66.Syndicated Inc. (Parody of 'Misery' by Soul Asylum)
67.Angry White Boy Polka (Medley)
68.Trash Day (Parody of 'Hot in Herre' by Nelly)
69.Phony Calls (Parody of 'Waterfalls' by TLC)
70.A Complicated Song (Parody of 'Complicated' by Avril Lavigne)
71.It's All About the Pentiums (An Adaptation of 'It's All About the Benjamins' By Puff Daddy)
72.Jerry Springer (Parody of 'One Week' By BareNaked Ladies)
73.Weird Al - Pretty Fly For A Rabbi
74.Grapefruit Diet (Parody of 'Zoot Suit Riot' By Cherry Poppin' Daddies)
75.Gump (Parody of 'Lump' by the Presidents of the United States)
76.Homer & Marge
77.Amish Paradise (Parody of 'Gangsta's Paradise' by Coolio)